[For a long time, sex was about fun and release but mostly fun. It was finding spaces to enjoy it and indulging, and it was as much about moaning as it was about laughing. Two people bonding over the entire experience from start to finish, and for many years, that feeling had faded away with the traumas of his losses, his actions and in much of his own isolation from such attentions. He was only in the few months escaping his grief back into the thrill of the fun.
Clive was part of that now. They welcomed each other with flirting and making eyes at each other and then the flurry of passions that led them to this very moment. He wanted the younger man to know that it meant a lot to him, that he invested as much here as he would with anyone that had made him feel this welcome and special. And in turn? This was someone he vowed to spend more time with Clive, returning even a fraction of the emotions the younger man set in him.
And he would. He would bring this younger man to the brink and watch him fall apart in the most beautiful way. Clive was big and broad similarly to him but with a slimmer waist and thighs, but there was nothing delicate about him. Clive's legs fell open, thighs spreading to provide him free reign to plow into the younger man as his own leisure and that was a significant trust.
That first thrust sent pleasure and heat crawling up his spine then it pooled in his belly and at the base of his brain. His shoulders bowed and pressed into Clive's fingernails, welcoming the bright points of flickering pain to mingle with the pleasure, and he repeated his previous thrust one after another, building to a rhythm and encouraged by the pleading.
Wasn't that just an ego boost?
His mouth attached itself to Clive's jaw, tasting that skin and the roughness of facial hair against his lips. He rumbled noises of pleasure with each thrust before he dropped his mouth further so that it was beside Clive's ear. He let the younger man feel and hear the full range of his pleasure between light panting to growling moans and groans. It added to and emphasized the moist drag and slap of their skin together, and his nipples dragged over Clive's on more than one occasion.]
So happy we're doing this here and not against a tree or in a patch of grass, handsome. So happy we found each other.
[Vander was a first for Clive in many ways, but the most significant of them was how sex was more than just the chasing of a high for him. Sure, that was part of it, but there was so much more to it than that. It wasn’t something that Clive had truly believed could come of sex like this. While a small part of him feared it, most of him relished it and he decided he was going to listen to the part of him that relished it. He wanted this and, for once, he was just going to let himself have it.
Another thing that he had never felt before was this level of intensity, of a desperation to both chase the high of his pleasure and hold on so it wouldn’t stop. Clive’s body, already sensitive from his first orgasm, was screaming its pleasure. He trembled against Vander, panting and moaning and writhing, chasing skin with his mouth, dragging hands and nails along that broad back. With each thrust, Clive felt himself become more and more unmoored in a way that he had been searching for.
And the sounds Vander was making? Clive slid a hand into the other man’s hair and held him there. He could practically feel each sound filling his body, surrounding him with the pleasure of knowing that this was his own doing. That Vander was making these sounds because of Clive’s body, Clive’s attention. All of the sensations, sounds, feelings, the taste of Vander. It was all building up in his system. He wasn’t sure how long he was going to last.]
Yes. [Clive clutched Vander to him. There was so much he wanted to say but his brain felt incapable of making words.] Glad that we waited. Glad that you’re here.
[Clive pet Vander’s hair, his shoulders, down the small of his back. He groaned at the feeling of how Vander’s muscles flexed as he fucked into him. He nuzzled Vander’s cheek, pressed wet kisses to any skin he could find, before finally managing more words.]
Keep going until you come. Even if I do first. Don’t stop until you’re done.
[Because he wasn’t going to last much longer and he needed to know what it would feel like to have this man’s cum inside of him. The thought made his abdomen clench, a fire burning steadily hotter inside of him.
He was so lost in pleasure that he didn’t register how he had started pleading, panting, moaning Vander’s name, begging incoherently for more, harder, please please please, vision starting to go white around the edges.]
[Vander fell into that pleasure chasing rhythm where the motions of his body became automatic once he had found that spot where he was comfortable and Clive was holding onto him and touching him in return. At that point, he could simply concentrate on them feeling good, on making small alterations so he was constantly brushing against the younger man's prostrate.
At this point the world was back to being just them, just the feel of them moving together, the slide of skin, the drag on his cock as it filled Clive over and over. While the act itself wasn't different, the sensations that Clive being an eager and muscled lover was, and it was sweet and hot and addictive all at the same time.
He mouthed on the younger man's neck and jawline, not leaving more than wet marks as he tasted skin and felt Clive returning the favour. There were brief pauses as his hair was held, waiting in anticipation to a pull and drag of his head, and he was still growing used to the sensation of his hair being long and clinging to his skin like this, adding a layer of stimulation previously not experienced.
He nodded his head at Clive's words, and he intended on it. He would drive the younger man over the edge and leave Clive hanging in that space of continual stimulation where one was too ramped up to escape entirely but too spent to achieve too much more. It was riding a wave that had built but would not fall off the map, and that's where he planned on leaving the younger man as he finished enjoying the feel of Clive all around him.
He did shift though, lifting himself higher on one arm so he could stare down into Clive's face so he could watch the younger man come undone. He smoothed his free hand down the length of the younger man's body, teasing nipples with fingers before he smeared pre-cum over his fingers. He took Clive's cock in hand, stroking it in time with his thrusts which were increasing in rhythm and power, driving hard now that he was assured Clive could take it this hard without being injured.]
Show me, handsome. I'll take care of you. [The words slipped from his lips like a promise, and he felt as wound up in pleasure as Clive looked under him. Those legs fallen open so willing and shaking with pleasure and his thrusting. It was an amazing sight, one he committed to memory.]
[The world narrowed to Vander, to the sensation of his body being filled, his skin being kissed, touched, his cock trapped between the two of them. The friction there was so sweet, so alluring, but not quite enough. He knew he could come from just his prostate. He had done it before, but he also knew the orgasm was so much more intense when his cock was stimulated at the same time. The warring desire to touch himself and not wanting to let Vander tickled at him.
And oh his mouth, how his lips and tongue felt against his skin. The urge to beg him to bite, to leave marks, to claim, came back and he almost let it out this time. He had already been pleading for so much, what was one more thing? But no. Not this time. Because there would be a next time. And maybe more times after that.
Clive loosened his grip just enough for Vander to be able to lift himself a bit higher, but he would be damned if he was going to let go. He had decided. He would let Vander’s cock do the work, chase the prostate orgasm. Was it a toss up if he would actually ejaculate? Yes. That didn’t matter. Not right now. But then Vander ended the war with that hand that roved over him. Clive’s body jumped at the stimulation to his nipples, at the feeling of Vander smearing precum that had leaked against his abs, rubbed between the two of them.
Distantly, Clive could feel the bed shake underneath them, posts scratching against the floor with each deliciously hard thrust. Clive’s hips met Vander’s, driving down on him with each thrust in, fucking himself into Vander’s palm.
And with a broken shout, he was coming for the second time that night, what little cum he had left spurting over Vander’s hand and Clive’s abs. His back arched, shoving himself against that man above him, eyes rolling and lashes fluttering as he chased that high, the high that came with pleasure so intense it bordered on pain.
Fingernails dug into whatever flesh they could find, drawing blood and singeing the area lightly. He clung to Vander, every muscle in his body trembling from the overwhelming pleasure, body clenching against the older man’s cock that was pushing so deep into him. Despite the building stimulation, Clive shifted to lock his ankles around Vander’s thighs, his body screaming for more and reprieve at once.]
Vander! Oh, Vander. Don’t s-stop.
[That was the last coherent thing Clive was able to utter as his voice turned to whispering Vander’s name against his skin like a prayer, moaning out, voice ravaged by pleasure and tinged lightly by pain.]
[It was a benefit to them both that the bed was solid and sturdy, as it was being put through its paces to a point. They weren't rolling around contesting each other and constantly changing positions, but they were both large men with considerable strength and the bed was rocking with the motions of that. It was the sign of a good bed that it could move along the floor and even hit the wall a few times and not show signs of weakness. If anything, the sounds only emphasized the moment that they were sharing together, a layer of the music added with the noises he and Clive were making for each other.
Vander enjoyed Clive's active participation, their hips meeting and grinding each other at each thrust, and the wrap of those arms were security for him. Clive was one of the few with long enough arms to slide around his shoulders and hold him, even with the loosened grip so he had access to the younger man's weeping cock. Clive being close to a second orgasm was only encouraging him, as he too was building towards his own peak.
He fisted the younger man's cock with a firm grip, driving them both as he mouthed on Clive's firm jawline again so he would not impede the sounds and words that Clive was dropping on him. It was like music to his ears hearing his lover's pleasure, and he sped up the rate of his thrusting to chase his own pleasure knowing that Clive was so close. It did not take too long for everything to cascade between his hand and thrusting to drive the younger man over.
Vander pulled his face back and watched Clive hungrily, watching as the pleasure of orgasm stiffened that body and washed through the younger man's expression. Perhaps it was the sweaty nature of their activities that caused Clive's hair to cling to his skin like that and the way the scar twisted with each word that fell from the younger man's lips, but it was such a beautiful sight under him that he nearly lost his rhythm to stare. There was a little hiccup of pause, but he was also driving over and over into that tightened heat of Clive's walls around his cock that he couldn't stop.
And that was the point for him as his hand became covered in some cum was to hold Clive there in that space of pleasure. He angled his hips so he dragged out the aftermath pleasure by driving his cock hard against the younger man's prostate, holding Clive in the depths of pleasure to wring him out, to show the full depth of what sex could allow someone to enjoy and endure in equal measure.
It was such a rush, and he was a few minutes behind Clive but he did orgasm with a loud growling groan, driving himself hard into his lover and riding Clive's hips as he released himself. Yet, as he tended to, he shifted his body and curled over Clive, his arms moving up to circle the younger man's head in a distinctly protective yet subconscious gesture. He kissed the corner of Clive's mouth and remained there as his hips ground against his lover's ass as he released himself in hot spurts, his eyes closing as he slowed and breathed hard through his nose.]
...you okay, beautiful? [His voice was hoarse and spent. He was a sweaty mess, but that was an excellent orgasm and he was all the happier for it.]
[The monastery was full of sturdy furniture made for long-term use and for that, Clive would be grateful when he came back to himself. He quite liked his room. It was near one of the training grounds and the sauna and it was private. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to be near the others who lived here, he just enjoyed his space. A new benefit of being farther away: he could be as loud as he wanted without having to disturb the others, assuming they weren’t walking by while he was being intimate. And that is what this was. It was intimacy. A kind Clive had never experienced before. His body and mind sang for it, clinging to every sensation.
Clive was too far gone to register Vander’s stare, his hunger as he watched the younger man writhe under him and beg for more, for release, for pleasure. The slightest whine fell from his lips at the hiccup in pace, but it didn’t matter. He was already crashing over the edge of an orgasm so intense his whole body could not stop trembling from it.
And how Vander kept driving into him after he came? Clive couldn’t help how loud he moaned, how much his body squirmed against the other man. Somehow, someway, Clive had just enough presence of mind to fight his body from shying away from the overwhelming pleasure. He wanted it. He wanted Vander pounding against his already overstimulated prostate, to feel the pleasure so extreme it started to become pain.
The expletive that fell from Clive’s mouth slurred into a moan deep enough to make his chest vibrate when he felt that wonderful warm heat start to fill him. He wanted that cum. He wanted all of it so deep he would never forget the feeling of being completely and totally filled by this man, that whenever he touched himself, fingered himself, he would remember what it was like to be dripping with the man over him, that it would never be quite enough without this glorious cock.
Just when Clive thought he might truly fall apart, Vander curled around him. He clung, suddenly desperate to keep himself safe from the world outside of Vander’s arms. It was cold out there, frightening and vast. He knew what happened next. Vander would finish riding out his pleasure, let himself come down, and then he would be alone. He couldn’t be alone. Maybe if he held on hard enough, he could have a few more minutes, long enough to quell the ache, to be ready for what he ran from. And yet, his eyes burned, his chest constricted.]
Please don’t go. [His whisper so quiet it barely left his lips, too afraid that if he spoke loud enough, he would break.]
[He panted and held himself in that afterglow as he basked in the warmth and sweat and mess that was good sex. He had to dug his knees further into the mattress so he didn't collapse on Clive under him, yet his posture and even efforts softened when he felt the younger man suddenly cling to him. Did Clive think he would simply finish off, gather his clothing and just leave without a word?
He slowly lowered himself to cover Clive's body completely, even as he began to soften inside and could roll off. He didn't. His arms tightened around both of their heads, caging them in together as he finally eased his legs and allowed them to half hang off of the bed, lightly knocking their feet together as he panted against Clive's cheek as his pulse slowly began to calm.]
Easy, handsome, I'm not going anywhere. [He heard quiet pain in Clive's voice, and it wounded him.
How many quick go arounds like this as Clive experienced? Had they been consensual or forced? Had they been the usual unfeeling quick quickies that was necessary but ended up being wholly unsatisfying for someone who seemed to want an emotional connection?
His fingers carded through Clive's damp hair, his own falling forward to caress his and Clive's face. He lightly peppered kisses across the younger man's cheeks and chin and lips, making no motion to move off of Clive until the younger man nudged or pushed him away. No, he was settled and letting the cooler air dry the sweat of his back and sides.]
You said I could stay over, remember? Why would I leave before we had to puzzle out how to sleep in the same bed when we are far too large for?
[He kissed and lingered on the scar on Clive's cheek.]
[He wanted to bask, to stay in the bubble of pleasure that was the afterglow. He felt it, the warmth bubbling around him, before this panic set in. Why was he starting to panic? He had no reason. And yet, his breath stuttered in his lungs. What was happening? Clive squeezed his eyes shut, gripping Vander hard enough to leave marks, nails having shortened once more. He tried to count his breaths, breathe slowly.
The bubble of warmth that covered him as Vander made a cage for them both soothed something in him and made another thing turn sour. He shouldn’t need this. He was a grown ass man who had sex with plenty of people before this. This wasn’t different. It was sex with someone he just met, chasing a pleasure.
But it was different. Vander had been attentive, funny, giving. He had taken his time, helped Clive pace himself despite both of them being desperate for their bodies to be connected. He was all-encompassing, then and now.
Ultimately, it was the gentle affection that did him in. He withstood the fingers running through his hair even when his chest tightened, the first kiss, the second kiss, and the third kiss tore through the thin defense he had left. It was a gentle kiss to his upper cheekbone, near his eye, that made him choke. He hoped desperately that his closed eyes would stop the way he could feel his eyes watering.
Fuck. He was not going to cry. It was just sex. He could do this. Clive took slow, deep breaths and loosened his grip, forced his desperation back despite it’s strong and clawing attempt to overwhelm him.
He really needed to stop lying to himself.
’What do you need from me, Clive?’
It hit him like a blow to the solar plexus. Everything. Nothing. Something. That tear he fought so hard to keep in slipped out.]
Fuck. [He hissed, not wanting to pull his arm in to wipe it away.] Sorry. Don’t know what’s come over me. I’m okay.
[Vander pressed his back into those nails, noting they were less sharp and even shorter - he had no idea what that was about - but still had bite to them. There were flares of discomfort that built on the ebbing pleasure from the lingering effects of his orgasm. He knew what it was to have another person cling to him, and he experienced that sort of sensation in the hold that Clive had on him. He wasn't concerned; perhaps he had pushed the younger man too hard after that second orgasm. It could be overwhelming.
He felt warm and wanted by that hold, the way that Clive didn't push him away and remained safely under his bulk. It wasn't his first time in this situation, but it had been a very long time. Self-sufficiency and unwillingness to show vulnerability was part and parcel of life in the Undercity. Too much weakness and someone could take advantage.
He hummed low in his throat as emotion overwhelmed Clive under him, eyes clenched shut but eyelashes wet and that expression showed it all. He nuzzled his nose against Clive's jawline, felt it tighten subtly after his question and watched that single tear fall from the corner of Clive's eye. His hand snapped down to capture the younger man's hand before it could wipe the tear away, all so he could lean up to kiss it away.
His arms moved as Clive swore, sliding them around the younger man's shoulders and pulling him in as he rolled them over so that Vander could wrap his arms and legs around the younger man to hold him close and allow Clive to use his neck as a way to escape further scrutiny on his part.]
I probably pushed you too hard after your orgasm. You can get wrung out being pushed like that. [He moved his rest his head on the top of Clive's.] Maybe I knocked something fun loose in you. [It was said teasingly, allowing them to rally together and lighten the mood.]
[And Clive did want Vander. That was part of what scared him. He barely knew the man and he already knew that they could have something strong. Clive had always had pretty good instincts when it came to people, especially after Phoenix Gate, and he learned to trust them. Thus far, Vander had proved those instincts correct. The other man saw into him and didn’t balk. He leaned into it. Not only that, but there was this. This gentleness that had been sprinkled throughout their time together so far. He knew that this was at least a little important to the other man or he wouldn’t have put so much work into it. What that importance was, Clive couldn’t say. He might understand one day, when he got to know the man better.
Assuming Vander wanted to get to know him better after this. It was embarrassing and Clive just wanted to dig himself a hole. He had never cried after sex before, never even felt his eyes burn. It had all been transactional, almost like services provided, professional. Maybe that was why. This was the furthest from that. This was passion and care and nothing that Clive had ever had but something he was realizing he had always wanted.
Founder save him, what a mess he was. If this was what he was going to be like maybe he should save Vander the trouble. The problem with that was that he didn’t want to. He didn’t want to let go of this. It was shocking and it hurt but it was also warm and fulfilling and it all had felt so good. Would he be asking for too much if he asked for their previous talk of seeing each other again would still stand?
Reflexively, he almost resisted when Vander grabbed his hand before he could reach his face, but then the older man was kissing the tear away and oh if that didn’t make something in him want to cry more. Was it relief? Gratitude? It wasn’t sorrow. Longing maybe? No matter what it was, Clive couldn’t help the little sigh that escaped him.
When offered, Clive took the opportunity to bury himself in Vander, pressing himself as close as he possibly could and tangling Vander’s legs with his own. He gladly tucked his face against Vander’s neck and breathed him in, his scent mixing with the smell of his sweat and their sex. His body already starting to calm down, Clive nuzzled in and pressed a soft kiss to Vander’s neck, a silent thanks.
Maybe. Though I did ask you to. [Another kiss, a little more playful this time, trying to show Vander that he was okay.] And it did feel ridiculously good.
[Clive playfully nipped Vander’s neck and smiled against him.]
Seems like you are particularly skilled in that department. If I’m not careful, I won’t have anything on the shelves anymore. You’ll turn me into a mess.
[A pause. His tone has a teasing edge to it when he speaks.]
Well, even more of a mess.
[He kisses Vander’s neck again, slowly, before nuzzling back in. This was the hard part. Teasing he could handle, but he didn’t want that to be the only thing they had after this outside of his practically vibrating apart.]
Thank you. I’m sorry if I made things uncomfortable.
[There was a mirror of a depth of pain that Vander understood. Yes, the hunger they both shared for what they withheld from seeping to the surface was what initially drew them together and passionately, but he also had observed and now confirmed a deep pain of old wounds that had not healed. It wasn't just about the sex after all; he'd had amazing sex, but it was this connection gravitated and locked them together. Someone who understood without having to verbalize, just be and just know. His natural instinct was to protect those in pain, and that included Clive now and not just because the younger man had shed a tear with him.
His arms remained supportive and warm around Clive's big broad shoulders, and his hands slowly stroked comforting lines up and down the lower portions of the younger man's back that he could reach. With their legs tangled, he stroked the upper portions of his feet against Clive's soles and toes. The obvious wetness between them from their activities would have to be cleaned, but he wasn't yet willing to part from their closeness right now, least of all with Clive kissing him.
Was it a distraction or a sign of affection or both? Likely both, soothing the potential awkwardness generated though he certainly didn't experience anything like that.]
Well, the point was to make us both feel good, and it seems that we accomplished that. You seem experienced, but have you been with partners who don't have much or aren't particularly mutual?
[He huffed a sound of amusement because yes he was skilled. Vander had been bedding down with people and being intimate with them since he was fifteen, and he had once had quite the appetite for such interactions. It had settled as he grew older and more experienced and his attention turned more to the liberation of Zaun then the Lanes and then... it had evaporated for the most part after the Day of Ash. Only since arriving in Etraya had he re-discovered the pleasure of having such intimacy often and building a connection well afterwards.
He kissed Clive's forehead affectionately.] You're handsome in all states of put-together and a mess, Clive. And I appreciate you showing me this vulnerability, intended or not.
[He chuffed softly, amused that discomfort was the potential take away.]
I'm not uncomfortable, so you have no reason to apologize. My take away is that I am so good at sex, I make grown men shed tears of joy. It was a very manly tear, if you want to think about it like that, though... I still contend you're the most beautiful man I've ever seen.
[To be taken care of was not something that Clive frequently sought out, let alone accepted. Yes, he could turn this comfort away now, opt for having put himself back together and let Vander extricate himself. Not push away, per se, but not pull closer. He could at least give the man the option. Vander was kind, too kind to pull away from someone who was in pain. Clive knew the feeling well. Clive knew he would untangle himself here, likely sooner rather than later at least because they were both filthy, but he wasn’t ready. He needed to make sure he was ready. This man had already helped him through enough for one night.
And, well, he was comfortable. Mess aside, it felt nice being held like this. Clive hadn’t known anyone who could wrap around him like this. The gentle touch was soothing, as it was likely intended, but even had he not being in a heightened emotional state, he would have wanted this. Clive couldn’t help the little nuzzles he kept rubbing against Vander’s neck, the light tracing patterns he made across Vander’s back with mindlessly affectionate fingertips.
He made a thoughtful sound against Vander’s skin.]
It was always mutual, just not particularly thorough.
[There hadn’t been a desire for that to be so, at least not on Clive’s part. And there was never time or the safety for it, a natural consequence for it being illegal for Clive to be touched.]
Well, I did ask you to take me apart so. Mission accomplished.
[Clive hunkered in, feeling himself blush yet again at the word. He nodded in response to the thanks, not really trusting himself to not sound like a complete idiot if he spoke. Objectively, he knew he was handsome. He had been told so a thousand times out of a hundred mouths, but this was different. Why did it feel so different? And any chuckle he felt building at Vander’s joke turned into the gentlest gasp. If handsome pulled at him, beautiful? Beautiful was an altogether different beast. Clive wanted to kiss him again. Badly.
So he did.
Clive pulled back just enough to tilt his head up and press his lips gently to Vander’s before whispering against them.]
And here you are again, flattering me. I’m beginning to think you are doing this on purpose.
[A joke, but also a question in a way. Coming from Vander, he wanted these words to be true.]
[They were allowed their post-coital bliss time, even if they were a mess, and it would be uncomfortable if it dried on their skin. Perhaps it was worthwhile for that alone that they were pressed together and the air couldn't reach those signs of their dalliance for the time being. After all, he knew the moment wouldn't last and they would pull apart and find a new balance with each other.
Vander was actually curious what that would appear as when he considered how lusty they had been with each other to reach this point. He was reluctant to lose the emotion and physical closeness with Clive, so he kept his arms and legs secured as they were until the younger man had had enough of his cuddling or the urge to further take care of Clive by cleaning them both up overrode the warm feeling.
After all, they could still cuddle after a good cleaning.
A low rumble left his throat at the nuzzling, his grey eyes closing as he savoured the sensation of simple and pure physical affection like that. No ulterior motive, no need to lead them down the path of sex again, just two men being affection with each other after an amazing orgasm.]
Ah, you mean it was for the purpose of releasing pressure or just a quick run in for the kicks?
[He was pleased to think that he could be considered thorough in this case. It still amazed him they had managed to make it back here in the first place. That in and of itself was a true accomplishment and then perhaps the arduous requirements of removing Clive's outfit had forced them to pace themselves. A little. Probably unintentionally.]
And now I'll put you back together.
[Hence the honest flattery. He could feel a little wave of heat against his neck signaling that Clive was either breathing harder or flushed. He tipped his head when he felt Clive move, expecting some words or them to look in each others eyes.
Instead, he found his lips captured, and he moaned softly at the pleasure in that. It said more than words ever could. He lifted one arm off of Clive's shoulders so he could cup the side of the younger man's cheek as they kissed.]
I am. [He whispered back.] It's truth, and it's clear you need to hear it and haven't been provided that enough in your life.
[Clive, too, was interested in learning how their relationship would develop after this. He knew the man holding him was curious and shrewd. He was a caretaker, at least with those he was intimate with, mostly confident in his body though there was that scar he was sensitive about and that brace he hadn’t removed. He seemed to prefer to keep attention on the other person he was with, but that could also be a side-effect of the scenario and what Clive was asking him to do. Affectionate and careful with an impulsive side that Clive didn’t think he showed often. There was much about this man that was a mystery and Clive found himself wanting to solve it.
A dreamy sigh responded to the low rumble from Vander. Those sounds alone could undo him, melt him into nothing, even when they weren’t doing anything sexual. It was the warmth in him of knowing that he wasn’t the only one impacted by the other. At least he hoped that was the case. Sounds could be faked. He was going to choose that these were real.]
Releasing pressure, mostly. Usually tension built up after battle.
[Might as well give a bit more context. He had already exposed this much of himself, whether he intended to or not. Surprisingly, he didn’t feel particularly hesitant about sharing that as he would with other people he knew. Maybe it was the fact that this was new, that Vander didn’t know anything about him that made him more comfortable.
Another beautiful sound that Clive captured between his lips. He could listen to those sounds until the heavens fell and the world ended and not get sick of them. The gentle way Vander held his cheek helped those feelings bloom. Clive tried and failws to fight back the little whimper that escaped lightly parted lips.]
Vander, I - You - Wh- [Clive cut himself off. No, what was going on in his mind was a maelstrom that he couldn’t put into words. Through it all, one thought hit him.
’I could fall for this man.’
That was what did it really, to help motivate him to finally pull away to tidy up. That wasn’t what this was. Things like this, they weren’t made for that kind of affection, not for anyone Clive had ever known, no matter what he ended up wanting. Besides, they had met in person once, talked twice. What, because he used a couple of pretty words in a voice so soft it made his heart clench, that was enough to make him swoon? Fire and Flame, how lonely was he?
And yet, he was still reluctant to detangle himself. But he did. They did need to be clean.]
Let me show you the bathhouse. We could both use it. Besides,
[And he really couldn’t help himself. Lust was safer but no less true. He leaned down from his position on the side of the bed to whisper in his ear.]
I want to know what it feels like to have your cum drip out of me when I walk.
[Powerful yet also knew. There was so much that he didn't know about Clive that would prove important to building their friendship. He had a good feeling about this man though, and he was hardly wrong with his instincts at this point of his life. Besides, the only enemy that he had here was of his own making, and the sly little man would hardly move openly and boldly against those that Vander took a shine to. No, it would be the long game; it always was. He was also rather confident that Clive could take care of himself on missions and as they grew closer together with time and efforts.
He nodded his head in understanding. The additional information it into context and he walked his fingers down Clive's dorsal spine processes.]
I understand what that's like. The bloodlust rush and no where for the energy to go so it becomes sexual energy. [When he had fought in the pits, it had been the same. That left over energy that drinking and dancing wouldn't quench.
Sometimes it was a quick person who showed interest, but more often, it was people who knew him or one in particular who was so often subjected to his intensity and interest. Those days seemed tinged with sadness and frustration these days, but back then, he had been having the time of his life regardless of how many times he had been punched or kicked that night. Vander rarely lost.
He felt revitalized as they kissed and cuddled like this, not exactly a rarity for him these days, but he enjoyed each and every opportunity. It chased away all the memories and decisions that lingered just behind his eyes. Yet, any thought of those old painful memories evaporated as Clive stuttered and fell over words, and it was actual restraint not to lean in and kiss him hard.
Perhaps it was best that Clive began to shift and move, making it clear that their cuddle time was over, and he wrinkled his nose as their bodies came apart and the mess they had made was smeared between them. He released his arms and levered himself up on an elbow to sit on the edge of the bed next to Clive, shivering at those whispered words.
What a filthy man. He enjoyed it.]
I'll be sure to walk behind you to enjoy the mess I made of you. [He smirked and nudged Clive with his shoulder.]
A good bath will do us both well, I think. Besides, a bath does mean I can still have my hands on you.
[He pushed himself to his feet, stepping over discarded clothing. If he stayed on the bed, there was no telling that they would behave themselves after all.]
[Strange uncertainties of his lonely heart aside, Clive was looking forward to getting to know Vander. The thing he found he was finding the most interesting about Etraya was his ability to meet people from so many different backgrounds, to see where their worlds were familiar and where they were different. He was learning so much and that itch that he always had to explore and delve deeper was only growing stronger. He had missed this curiosity. Harpocrates had encouraged it, helped it flourish, and knowing that he would be able to continue expanding that was exciting. Oh the stories he could tell when he got home.
Vander’s understanding of the feeling was startling, but the kinship he felt there sparked. There had been no real way he could describe the feeling that came with violence unshed and with Vander, he didn’t have to.]
Exactly. Having sex was safer than fighting. Less noticeable.
[And moderately more satisfying. When he was like that, when he needed that release, if his opponent couldn’t stand their own against him, it didn’t help. He needed to be challenged and there were so few who could do that, even then. Once Tiamat had found him it had been different, but not by much.
There was that shade of sorrow underneath it all and he knew that his eyes reflected the same. Embarrassment had temporarily robbed Clive of his and it seems Vander’s too. Well, if he was going to look like a fool at least something positive could come from it.
It did, however, take a great deal of willpower and hands gripped hard enough in the sheets for his knuckles to turn white to not grab Vander and drag him back down after he stood. How he could even feel a spark of arousal after all they had done, he had no idea.
Gravity was already starting to do its work as Clive stood. This wasn’t the first time he had let someone come inside him, but it certainly was the most enjoyable. The feeling of the slow trickle of cum tickling its way onto his thigh was strange to say the least, but imagining the look in Vander’s eyes as he watched Clive walk ahead of him made his heart rate increase.
Clive slid by Vander to get to the door, dragging a hand along the small of his back and then giving his ass a playful slap before stepping out. The bath was right next door with the sauna and he wasn’t particularly worried about anyone seeing him right now. He didn’t know where Yuri and An Zhe were, but he knew that everyone else was at the battle.]
It’s funny, [He threw an inviting look back at Vander.] I was going to say the same thing. I hope you don’t think you will be doing the majority of the touching.
Oh yeah no, I had sex after fighting. [There was a pause as he considered how much information to divulge then decided it wasn't anything he was ashamed of.] In my young adult days when I needed extra money, I entered myself in the pit fighting rings. It was such a rush putting opponents in the dirt, but often I was living high on the win. I needed another outlet, so sex was it.
[It wasn't battle. It wasn't war. Not in the same sense that he expected that Clive fought and suffered under. He had chosen that path because he was talented, people loved to see him fight and of course win a lot of money on him usually. It made ends meet when the mines or the docks didn't provide enough, and Vander also knew that life wasn't sustainable. He'd taken his share of hits to the head to know it would kill him if it was his primary income, so he didn't. He had that choice. Clive clearly had not.]
Less noticeable, is it? [Vander made a point of running his hand over where he knew Clive had marked him and then over the reddened hand print on his pectoral that had been burned there. He smirked, nudging the younger man when Clive flowed to his feet similarly.
He let Clive take the lead so he could indeed watch the younger man's back, and his eyes fell to the cum leaking down the back of Clive's thighs and even between them. He chewed his lower lip to keep from making noise about the sight as his stomach felt like it was flipping from heat and pleasure. His shoulders twitched and his hands had to clench to resist reaching out to capture Clive around the waist when the younger man slapped his ass. He was not twenty years old anymore. He could behave.
So he followed a few steps behind, watching the way Clive walked and his brows drew together. How did this man not have lovers parading in and out of his bed at all times? So much sex appeal.
Vander followed, unashamed of his body or his nudity as they moved from one room down the hall the bathing area. It was hot and humid in here as he stepped in, looking around at the amenities, and he smirked at the teasing words. He walked forward as if he were going to explore where everything lead and instead took the opportunity to slap Clive's ass as a returned favour.]
It sounds like we're competing again. It also sounds like we mutually benefit, so I don't mind.
[Clive nodded in understanding. He had watched many a man fight in unsanctioned pits. Thought about doing it once or twice himself, but it was always more dangerous when Branded were involved and the chances of him making it out of one of those fights alive were slim. The rest of it, the thrill of opponents defeated… That way there lay blood and shame that he knew would haunt him until his dying day.]
Not finding a way to expell the rest of that energy could be dangerous. Better to not tempt fate.
[That brought a chuckle out of Clive, feeling a little lighter. He returned the smirk and fought the temptation to touch one of the marks. Two for two on the success rate of resisting touching Vander. He wasn’t sure that would last terribly long.]
You, sir, are a special circumstance.
[Clive could practically feel Vander’s eyes on him. How his body found it in itself to send a thrill through him, he had no idea. He let himself bask in the feeling, even if it came with the silent plea to Vander to grab him, touch him again, kiss him. He was capable of controlling himself. He was a grown man.
Until Vander returned the slap when they were safely inside the bathing room. Then he whipped around with the speed and grace of someone who had honed their body for physicality and the sword for decades, grabbing Vander’s wrist and yanking him back. He met Vander half way, putting a hand on his hip to stabilize him while pressing hungry lips against the older man’s.
He guided Vander back towards the bath, stopping at the edge and giving Vander’s hip a squeeze. With a gentle push of his hip and light tug of his wrist, Clive lowered the two of them to the edge of the warm water before breaking the kiss.]
I see you’re used to winning. [Clive reached for a small bucket and ran it through the water. He dipped a finger in for a moment until the water was steaming afresh and poured it slowly over Vander’s chest, rubbing small circles against where he could see they had pressed their mess together.]
[There was an almost secretive smile at the agreement between them. Not expelling the energy was dangerous, especially if the enforcers were on one of their frequent rotational crack downs. A man with too much spring in their step spoiling for a fight from being overenergized was a bad combination; it was a mistake he had made twice and then decided to find more productive outlets for that energy.]
Were all the people at the front with you branded like you? At least people with their backs against the wall similarly that you could bond with?
[He liked the idea of being a special circumstance with Clive. They had certainly found their youth with each other, impulsiveness and idiocy in equal measure because they somehow lacked much self control thus far. How long would this last? It could be this encounter, or he suspected it may take time to run its course from their systems. After all, he wanted to know about that hunger he had seen reflected, know its source, perhaps feel it again before they had parted ways in the morning.
Perhaps feel it against his skin more than once.
It seemed likely the way that they teased each other, and he was not disappointed when Clive turned on him. He set his shoulders and dropped his stance on his knees as if expecting the younger man to pounce on him or maybe even decide to shove him. His hands were already poised to respond, years of experience raising his defenses naturally and subconsciously. He noted instantly that their stances were different, and he could pick out why that was. Vander was a brawler. Clive was someone who used the blade. It required different stances and movements to accomplish proficiently.
And that's where he had the advantage as Clive pulled him in. He crowded in quickly, closing their distance with the pull and nearly slamming his chest around Clive's. Clive was not a small man by any measure, but Vander was built and honed for close-quarter encounters, and he knew how to take up space with his body even as their lips crashed together.
It wasn't a fight, but he felt the flicker of interest of a throw down as his parted his lips to allow the younger man access and control of that as his hands settled neatly on Clive's hips. He allowed himself to be guided in the unfamiliar room, and he managed to step down into the bath without tripping.
As soon as Clive pulled from the kiss, Vander was leaning in to mouth against the younger man's jawline, up to his ear where he growled a low affectionate challenge. His hands dropped away as he was no where physically ready for another round of fun so soon, and they had to be clean before they could enjoy being dirty again.]
I wouldn't say that. I've suffered my fair share of losses, but there's always something to learn in them. [He looked down, noting the finger in the water and shifting curiosity.] Is that magic? No... runes or words or gestures? It just comes to you?
[Curiosity made him compliant to the washing, shivering at the warmth of the water and enjoying it. He had only just cooled from their previous fornication.]
[There was always someone in a position of power looking to take it out on something they considered lower than them, someone they thought they could get away with hurting. Clive had taken his fair share of punishment from people such as those. There were many on the front that could not handle that kind of attention. He could. So he took it. The pain had reminded him that he was alive, that he had a purpose.]
Some of them were. A lot of us were essentially used as human shields for foot soldiers. Very few were trained well. Some of us came to the front battle-ready, some not quite so much. It was safer not to get attached. Nine times out of ten, you wouldn't see them again.
[And Clive had been a whirlwind. The only place he felt even a modicum of life was in the fray, sword and fire both a massacre and a dance. That skill saved him from the front, but did not put him anywhere even remotely safer. But those were stories he kept locked deep. His latest attempt to talk about it hadn’t exactly been fulfilling or relieving.
As was what seemed to be his habit, Vander chased the ruminations away. His mind registered the shift in position, saw the preparation for defense and retaliation, and he had to stop himself from reflexively responding in kind. He groaned at the feeling of Vander pressed against him again.
He let his head fall to the side once they were seated, giving Vander access as he warmed the water. When Vander dropped away, Clive turned to nip his ear, responding with his own growl, almost low enough to be a purr. He could wait. Hell, he needed to wait. His body wouldn’t be ready for another round. That didn’t mean he couldn’t enjoy the feeling.
The light that came to Vander’s eyes when he was curious was so beautiful. The fire of passion kindled into something gentler, a softer affection. He wanted to touch him, cup his cheek, tell him he was beautiful. But first, he needed to help the man satiate his curiosity.]
Mmhmm. [Clive pulled his hand back from Vander’s torso, having removed the bulk of the mess, and let a lick of flame start at his fingertip and wrap slowly down his hand before shaping it into an orb and letting it float into the air, illuminating the area in a flickering glow.]
We’re born with it. Some gestures can help concentrate it or guide it, but they aren’t needed. Though most don’t use it as flippantly as this. Turning to stone can be one hell of a deterrent when a person has the choice.
[Clive took a slow breath, turning to fiddle with the bucket. He should look when he said this, made eye contact, but he couldn’t.]
But like I told you before, I can use as much magic as I want and I do without a single speck of stone appearing on my skin. Fire isn’t the only element that responds to me either. In a strange sort of way, I’m a collector. Not exactly because I want to be.
[First, a green sheen pulls through the air, blowing the orb above them farther away, the air giving it a small burst of fuel. Then, a bit of lightning dances up Clive’s arm and disappears when it touches his cheek, chased by scales of earth rippling across the same arm as though it were making armor and dissipating. Finally, small motes of light rise off of him, filling the air with a constellation of sparkling pinpricks, before those slowly fade and then the fire goes out.
Clive didn’t move or say a single thing through the entire display, bucket forgotten in his hands as he stared at the water licking at his feet.]
[Vander knew it was a painful topic, could see it written on Clive's face but mostly in those blue eyes. There was a shadow there that only loss and being guarded could bring in another person, and he had seen it time and time again in his lifetime. He leaned in, pressing a kiss to the scar and simply lingering there as his thumbs stroked over the swell of Clive's hipbones.]
You've weathered a lot of trauma in your lifetime. You shoulder it well. Do you... find the nights hard? When you're alone with no one to distract you from the remembrance?
[He asked it quietly and with understanding, yet he kept any expectation of a long answer out of his voice entirely. He would not wish to be pressured to provide any such details with someone he had just met, and yet, there was that feeling of kinship. It was so rare that he found that connection so quickly. Still, it was dangerous territory to ask such things as reciprocation was how many might respond. Was he ready to grind their good mood into the ground? No, perhaps neither them were. This was best for a pillow talk when the room was completely dark.
He seated himself next to Clive, shivering at the little growl-like-purr from the younger man. He liked that sound, and it brought his nose back around to nudge and nuzzle Clive's cheek in response. Neither was them were in position to start something, of course. This was still strangely comfortable, the play, the affection.
He did not hide his curiosity or his awe over this strange power. He had seen illusion magic tricks as a boy and even learned a few to amuse his children before they were too old to appreciate it. What Clive was capable of was like the stories of old, the mages who could wield the elements at their whim and create mass destruction if they wanted to. Then he was reminded of the spirits like Janna whose control over wind and air made her a saviour to sailor and those lost in the tunnels of the undercity.
His eyes widened as Clive moved from one element to another to another, and from his conversation with Cid, that did not seem particularly usual. Even Clive's own words indicated that it was not typical, though he could not and did not understand the implications of what it would mean to be a 'collector' of anything magic related. It was dawning on him how unique Clive was, especially when he recalled the way Cid's skin had looked, mottled and hardened.
He shifted so he could rest his shoulder against Clive's, still looking at the spot in the air where the fire had last been seen. He was keenly aware of the younger man's pensive quietness, and he slid his arm around that slim waist.]
I've never seen anything like that before. It's amazing what you can do. [He pulled his eyes and regarded Clive then moved to rest his forehead to the younger man's temple.] You keep showing me these tricks of yours and I might swoon, handsome. You're talented, but in the end, I like you for you rather than what you can do.
[Clive was beginning to really enjoy those kisses that Vander kept directing at his scar. He never thought he would really enjoy attention there. The feeling on the scarred tissue itself was muted, more of a pressure than a feeling, but the affection there was nice. It made something ugly feel much less so. The gentle strokes agains this hipbones was soothing. He could get used to this.]
My life has been a long one for as short as it has been.
[Clive stopped to make eye contact, to really look at Vander. He searched those grey eyes that showed and hid so much. That was not a question from a man who was not intimately familiar with pain. He cupped Vander’s face gently between his hands. He gently stroked Vander’s cheekbones, considering what he wanted to share.]
They can be. But I expect you are familiar with that.
[He guided Vander’s face down and pressed a kiss to the other man’s forehead before shifting to press his forehead to Vander’s, nuzzling their noses lightly together.]
You can come to me when the nights are difficult to weather.
[They didn’t need to talk about how those nights were difficult or what that may look like, not now. He expected that getting Vander to actually accept the help and follow through with it would be particularly difficult, but he didn’t have much ground to stand on there either. Regardless, there would be time for that. And time was likely what was needed.
Had Clive been watching Vander as he showed his magic, maybe he would not have been as surprised when the other man moved closer and slid his arm around his waist. He heard the man moving so he did not freeze or flinch at the contact. If anything, he leaned into it. He expected hesitancy, maybe even fear, but not this. It was comfortable and warm. It was something he wanted to keep.
He had been planning on telling Vander that he was the one that he told him about earlier, that he was the vessel for a creature that labelled itself god, but maybe he didn’t have to. Not because it was a secret to be hidden, but because Vander may genuinely not change his mind.]
You like me for me.
[Clive swung himself into Vander’s lap and kissed him, slow and soft, another thank you done in words he didn’t know how to use. He pulled back but stayed in Vander’s lap. He wanted to see his face, to look into his eyes, to see the warmth that he heard in the other man’s voice, even at what he thought to be the light tease.]
You call me beautiful, and yet, here you are.
[He stroked the back of a hand along Vander’s cheek before turning it to rest against the side of Vander’s neck.]
Do you realize what you do? I mean truly understand it? A soul like yours is rare and usually forged from pain. I see it in you. [He raised his hand again to touch at the corner of Vander’s eye.] But I also see the beauty you hold. Our souls may carry something dark in them, but they also carry something profoundly good.
[Clive leaned in and kissed him before resting their foreheads together.]
Did you know that when you find something curious or interesting you get this little light in your eye, like the world is a marvelous place and you want that little bit of it not just to yourself but to share. It’s - [Clive laughed quietly.]
You talk about my making you swoon, but if you keep showing me sights like that I might just be doomed.
[He pulled Vander to him in a hug and rested his chin on the other man’s shoulder. He’s a little shyer when next he speaks.]
And I like it when you call me handsome. Never thought I’d be the type to like pet names.
It means that you'll have some amazing stories to pass down both the kids in your care and perhaps your own someday. [It was too early to ask if Clive wanted a family, and it was not a subject that he was keen to discuss at any length. Still, one had to consider the value of life stories to the younger generations whether they were related by blood or circumstance.
He maintained eye contact right back, and he was once again reminded how bright blue Clive's irises were. More than that, the younger man displayed a similar pain that he knew lived inside of him, and he wondered what mistakes or regrets that lay burdened on Clive. Or perhaps it was all loss. He knew about Cid after all. That couldn't be easy.]
It seems like we both are familiar. [There was no need to delve into details.] I appreciate the offer. Thankfully I'm a bartender, so most nights are filled with serving equal parts happiness and misery to people. [But those early morning hours? From three-to-five? Those were tough and he hoped he was sleeping through it.
Perhaps someday he would take Clive up on the offer. Usually, he exhausted himself so it wasn't as necessary these days as it had been when he first arrived to Etraya and had nothing but pain and memories. The nights were easier, but the bad ones came on occasion. Sleeping next to someone helped, calmed that notion that he was alone and isolated with only his losses and the realities of his decisions to keep him company.
And it was miracles like this that was an excellent distraction. Clive wasn't the only one with magic, of course. He'd seen signs of it from others on various missions, had been informed of his inferiority by teens with wacky powers, and he'd watched it all with curiosity. This was probably the first time someone showed him without superiority but with a tinge of pensive sadness, like Clive was waiting for rejection. It was valid, wasn't it? It's how Clive had been treated and how the younger man had ended up branded.
He smiled as Clive swung up into his lap again and he parted his legs to provide a larger area for the younger man to perch. His arm moved from around Clive's waist to settle instead on the younger man's hip, and he tipped his head back just a little to continue to view Clive.]
I do, yeah. Though you seem to be waiting for a different reaction about being elemental collector. You're special as who you are, and I like that.
[The kiss spoke more of the younger man's emotional state than word probably could, and he could read into the gesture all he liked. He reached up so he could tuck some of Clive's dark hair back with two fingers, corner of his lips twitching as he felt the Clive's hand on his cheek and all those rough callouses that added character to the touch.
He issued a soft 'ha' at the question, his expression soft and relatively open.] We've both lived difficult eclectic lives. I wouldn't consider my soul any rarer than anyone else. You and I just happen to share certain similarities. [Yet, his grey eyes darkened for a moment, and he glanced aside for a moment as he recalled that memory of what he would become. He looked back at Clive.] There is something dark in me.
[He let that kiss soothe the momentary disquiet and he nudged their noses together as Clive's forehead came to rest on his own. This was a very personal change of pace for them after the flurry from behind, and yet, it felt just as natural.]
You wouldn't be the first to tell me that, but it has been a long time. [He met Clive's gaze with his own.] The world is a marvelous place. And it's made better because you're in it just being yourself.
[He chuckled and wrapped his arms around Clive's waist, appreciating the sentiment. He hadn't been looking for feelings to develop aside from camaraderie and friendship, yet their connection was oddly deep for having just met.]
I want... you to feel good about this, about everything. There's a sadness to you that I see and we've only just met, but I like you, Clive.
[He stroked his hands up and down Clive's back, turning his head just a bit to view the younger man from the corner of his eye.]
Is that so? Do you prefer handsome or beautiful? I'm good with both.
I’ve always enjoyed stories. I don’t really talk about it, but I always thought that I would like to tell my own some day.
[A light blush spreads from the tips of his ears to dust on his cheeks as he talks. There was only one person he had ever spoken to about this, but Vander felt like a safe option. It felt like Clive could show parts of him that he had been too nervous to with others that knew him from home. There were no ideas of who he was, of what might be at odds with what they saw from him regularly.]
Then maybe on the nights that are too much to bear I can come visit. Is there something that can play music where you work?
[He couldn’t guarantee that he would go or not. Sometimes solitude was what was best when the nights were difficult. He thought of all of the nights he spent in the Fat Chocobo or the Tub and Crown, nursing an ale and listening to music in the quiet of the night. There was always someone awake at the Hideaway, but it was as if there was some unspoken rule that the wee hours of the morning or the darkest hours of night were not for talking. He still ended up being the receiver of many a woe, but he didn’t mind. Helping people distracted him and it only improved the lives of others.]
I’ve found that music soothes in a way that most things don’t.
[Clive settled in at Vander’s unspoken offer of more space. They would get back to washing, but right now the only thing he felt particularly inclined to focus on was the man in front of him. The bath wasn’t going anywhere. It could wait. For now, he was going to marvel at the man beneath him, watch the shifts in those beautiful grey eyes, the slight changes in his face as he went from talking about pain and happiness, the wall of flippancy he pulled up at compliments, how genuine he was in his praise. He was a strange man and Clive did not want to miss a single thing.
Clive smiles and in it there is both sorrow and relief.]
Thank you. [Perhaps it was an odd thing to say to someone telling you that you are special as you are, but he didn’t know how else to convey to Vander how much those words truly meant. Clive closed his eyes, sighing into the touch. When was the last time someone had touched his hair? Had there been a time?]
You can disagree with me on that, but - [He placed a quick, light kiss to the tip of Vander’s nose.] You would be wrong. [Clive, too, moved to tuck some hair behind Vander’s ear and searched his eyes.] You’re not alone in that. [Clive gives Vander a small, sad smile.] At least we are in that particular boat together.
[And that is all Clive is going to say on that matter. He lets their proximity soothe him just as much as it soothes Vander. This was not what he had expected when he brought Vander home, but it was wonderful. A bit frightening for how deep the connection felt after so little time together, but still oddly right. That was something to examine later. For now, Clive melted into the feeling of Vander’s arms around him.]
Likewise. I didn’t expect to meet someone quite like you here and, well, I like you too. There is so much I want to know, to show you. Is that strange?
[There was so much that Clive wanted to learn about Vander. He wanted to see the world through his eyes, the beautiful, the strange, the ugly. To hear about his life, his stories, his joys and sorrows. Clive had always enjoyed getting to know people, but what startled him here was that he wanted to return that sentiment. He wanted to show Vander the quiet beauty of the world around them, the soothing wash of the moon at night, how water lapping against the shore brought solace, the music the world made. To share with him peace, but also pain. Joy and rage. Hope and fear.
Clive tilted his head and pressed a kiss to Vander’s neck, humming in pleasure at the feeling of Vander’s hands running up and down his back. How a man could both set him ablaze and soothe him so thoroughly, Clive didn’t think he would ever know.]
Hmm… [Clive thought for a bit, the room quiet save for the gentle sound of water lapping against the sides of the bath.]
Can I be selfish and ask for both?
[He was well and truly blushing now. From many others it may sound like a bit of a joke, asking if they could be selfish, but there was something painfully genuine about his whispered question.]
And I have faith that that day will come. It will be a good one, don't worry. You can tell them tales of your adventures and all the people that you met along the way.
[Perhaps it was that he would also try to help Clive succeed in saving his world, not that Vander thought that he could do all that much. Perhaps they would be partnered on a mission in future, but he did wish that sort of opportunity for someone that wanted it. He had the impression that the road ahead of Clive was long and difficult. He did want to support any way that he could; this was a young man who deserved to find a path to eventual happiness and peace.
He hummed at the question, fingers still carding lightly through Clive's sweeping bangs to put them in some semblance of order. Mostly he was doing it to keep touching the younger man.]
Yeah, there's a jukebox in the place that plays some good music. What kind of music do you like? I always turn it on when I'm doing prep when I open and clean up when I close. I'll save you a seat at the bar if you want to come and visit. I'll even pour you your favourite drink, whatever that may be.
[The offer was there between them then. If they needed a little company, they could find each other in their various spaces and just exist together. It was an option, meaning that there was no pressure to endure alone if that was preferable. Yet, he did wonder if he would make the trek out to the Monastery on occasion to see Clive, though the younger man seemed to be active and would make busy in the time between missions. They could find each other randomly. People like them tended to be able to do that.
And there was plenty that they would learn about each other. Vander was currently aware of their similarities and their differences. Clive reminded him a little of himself when he was decades younger, full of life and stubborn. There was pain tinged there too, overlaid and buried with determination and earnest charisma.]
What does being a elemental collector mean to you? To everyone else who knows you?
[He thought it might be worthwhile to learn a little about this. Even if he didn't consider it important to his affections to Clive, that didn't mean he shouldn't learn more about it. After all, there were plenty from Clive's world here, and if Vander was associating, it might be important for him to understand nuance so he could both protect and help the younger man where others maybe involved.
He huffed softly, aware that Clive had a different opinion on his soul. He also had the impression that there was no turning it right now. His hands stroked the younger man's thighs and hips then up until he was stroking his fingers over muscle layered over Clive's ribs.]
Are you saying that I don't know myself better than you do? You're turning in a bit of a punk if you're going to claim that. [His tone was jovial and amused and without any heat. If anything, there was a rebound of affection in it. Then his tone went softer, serious.] That's what I saw in your eyes on the hilltop, isn't it? That darkness you have to control or else...?
[They could end it there, not speak on such things and just return to enjoying one another's company. The bath and its water was all here, and Clive was smearing cum on his thighs from being seated that long. He moved to gather water to start to wash the younger man's belly of their shared mess from not even an hour before, rubbing his hands and removing the residue even as he watched the younger man perched on his lap.]
The timing is probably strange, but I'm willing to go with it if you are. Isn't that how all friendships start?
[They have clearly sped up that timeline in their own way with how intensely they react to each other, but he found it comforting to connect this strongly to another person. They came from completely different worlds that carried similarities in theme and the human condition, but they had so much that they could show and tell, to drag details out in casual conversation and well... he had no doubt this wasn't the end of their intimacy together.
He tipped his chin up and away at the lips on his neck, rumbling in his chest softly. His hands continued their motions while also occasionally washing their fronts with damp hands.]
It's not selfish at all, so yes, you can have both.
[He could feel the heat radiating from Clive's face, a smile on his lips knowing that the younger man was blushing up a storm. He liked having nicknames that stuck with his friends and his lovers, though their names were equally important.]
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2025-07-23 03:10 am (UTC)Clive was part of that now. They welcomed each other with flirting and making eyes at each other and then the flurry of passions that led them to this very moment. He wanted the younger man to know that it meant a lot to him, that he invested as much here as he would with anyone that had made him feel this welcome and special. And in turn? This was someone he vowed to spend more time with Clive, returning even a fraction of the emotions the younger man set in him.
And he would. He would bring this younger man to the brink and watch him fall apart in the most beautiful way. Clive was big and broad similarly to him but with a slimmer waist and thighs, but there was nothing delicate about him. Clive's legs fell open, thighs spreading to provide him free reign to plow into the younger man as his own leisure and that was a significant trust.
That first thrust sent pleasure and heat crawling up his spine then it pooled in his belly and at the base of his brain. His shoulders bowed and pressed into Clive's fingernails, welcoming the bright points of flickering pain to mingle with the pleasure, and he repeated his previous thrust one after another, building to a rhythm and encouraged by the pleading.
Wasn't that just an ego boost?
His mouth attached itself to Clive's jaw, tasting that skin and the roughness of facial hair against his lips. He rumbled noises of pleasure with each thrust before he dropped his mouth further so that it was beside Clive's ear. He let the younger man feel and hear the full range of his pleasure between light panting to growling moans and groans. It added to and emphasized the moist drag and slap of their skin together, and his nipples dragged over Clive's on more than one occasion.]
So happy we're doing this here and not against a tree or in a patch of grass, handsome. So happy we found each other.
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Date: 2025-07-23 04:06 am (UTC)Another thing that he had never felt before was this level of intensity, of a desperation to both chase the high of his pleasure and hold on so it wouldn’t stop. Clive’s body, already sensitive from his first orgasm, was screaming its pleasure. He trembled against Vander, panting and moaning and writhing, chasing skin with his mouth, dragging hands and nails along that broad back. With each thrust, Clive felt himself become more and more unmoored in a way that he had been searching for.
And the sounds Vander was making? Clive slid a hand into the other man’s hair and held him there. He could practically feel each sound filling his body, surrounding him with the pleasure of knowing that this was his own doing. That Vander was making these sounds because of Clive’s body, Clive’s attention. All of the sensations, sounds, feelings, the taste of Vander. It was all building up in his system. He wasn’t sure how long he was going to last.]
Yes. [Clive clutched Vander to him. There was so much he wanted to say but his brain felt incapable of making words.] Glad that we waited. Glad that you’re here.
[Clive pet Vander’s hair, his shoulders, down the small of his back. He groaned at the feeling of how Vander’s muscles flexed as he fucked into him. He nuzzled Vander’s cheek, pressed wet kisses to any skin he could find, before finally managing more words.]
Keep going until you come. Even if I do first. Don’t stop until you’re done.
[Because he wasn’t going to last much longer and he needed to know what it would feel like to have this man’s cum inside of him. The thought made his abdomen clench, a fire burning steadily hotter inside of him.
He was so lost in pleasure that he didn’t register how he had started pleading, panting, moaning Vander’s name, begging incoherently for more, harder, please please please, vision starting to go white around the edges.]
Getting [he gasped.] Close.
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Date: 2025-07-23 01:23 pm (UTC)At this point the world was back to being just them, just the feel of them moving together, the slide of skin, the drag on his cock as it filled Clive over and over. While the act itself wasn't different, the sensations that Clive being an eager and muscled lover was, and it was sweet and hot and addictive all at the same time.
He mouthed on the younger man's neck and jawline, not leaving more than wet marks as he tasted skin and felt Clive returning the favour. There were brief pauses as his hair was held, waiting in anticipation to a pull and drag of his head, and he was still growing used to the sensation of his hair being long and clinging to his skin like this, adding a layer of stimulation previously not experienced.
He nodded his head at Clive's words, and he intended on it. He would drive the younger man over the edge and leave Clive hanging in that space of continual stimulation where one was too ramped up to escape entirely but too spent to achieve too much more. It was riding a wave that had built but would not fall off the map, and that's where he planned on leaving the younger man as he finished enjoying the feel of Clive all around him.
He did shift though, lifting himself higher on one arm so he could stare down into Clive's face so he could watch the younger man come undone. He smoothed his free hand down the length of the younger man's body, teasing nipples with fingers before he smeared pre-cum over his fingers. He took Clive's cock in hand, stroking it in time with his thrusts which were increasing in rhythm and power, driving hard now that he was assured Clive could take it this hard without being injured.]
Show me, handsome. I'll take care of you. [The words slipped from his lips like a promise, and he felt as wound up in pleasure as Clive looked under him. Those legs fallen open so willing and shaking with pleasure and his thrusting. It was an amazing sight, one he committed to memory.]
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Date: 2025-07-23 02:47 pm (UTC)And oh his mouth, how his lips and tongue felt against his skin. The urge to beg him to bite, to leave marks, to claim, came back and he almost let it out this time. He had already been pleading for so much, what was one more thing? But no. Not this time. Because there would be a next time. And maybe more times after that.
Clive loosened his grip just enough for Vander to be able to lift himself a bit higher, but he would be damned if he was going to let go. He had decided. He would let Vander’s cock do the work, chase the prostate orgasm. Was it a toss up if he would actually ejaculate? Yes. That didn’t matter. Not right now. But then Vander ended the war with that hand that roved over him. Clive’s body jumped at the stimulation to his nipples, at the feeling of Vander smearing precum that had leaked against his abs, rubbed between the two of them.
Distantly, Clive could feel the bed shake underneath them, posts scratching against the floor with each deliciously hard thrust. Clive’s hips met Vander’s, driving down on him with each thrust in, fucking himself into Vander’s palm.
And with a broken shout, he was coming for the second time that night, what little cum he had left spurting over Vander’s hand and Clive’s abs. His back arched, shoving himself against that man above him, eyes rolling and lashes fluttering as he chased that high, the high that came with pleasure so intense it bordered on pain.
Fingernails dug into whatever flesh they could find, drawing blood and singeing the area lightly. He clung to Vander, every muscle in his body trembling from the overwhelming pleasure, body clenching against the older man’s cock that was pushing so deep into him. Despite the building stimulation, Clive shifted to lock his ankles around Vander’s thighs, his body screaming for more and reprieve at once.]
Vander! Oh, Vander. Don’t s-stop.
[That was the last coherent thing Clive was able to utter as his voice turned to whispering Vander’s name against his skin like a prayer, moaning out, voice ravaged by pleasure and tinged lightly by pain.]
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Date: 2025-07-24 01:00 pm (UTC)Vander enjoyed Clive's active participation, their hips meeting and grinding each other at each thrust, and the wrap of those arms were security for him. Clive was one of the few with long enough arms to slide around his shoulders and hold him, even with the loosened grip so he had access to the younger man's weeping cock. Clive being close to a second orgasm was only encouraging him, as he too was building towards his own peak.
He fisted the younger man's cock with a firm grip, driving them both as he mouthed on Clive's firm jawline again so he would not impede the sounds and words that Clive was dropping on him. It was like music to his ears hearing his lover's pleasure, and he sped up the rate of his thrusting to chase his own pleasure knowing that Clive was so close. It did not take too long for everything to cascade between his hand and thrusting to drive the younger man over.
Vander pulled his face back and watched Clive hungrily, watching as the pleasure of orgasm stiffened that body and washed through the younger man's expression. Perhaps it was the sweaty nature of their activities that caused Clive's hair to cling to his skin like that and the way the scar twisted with each word that fell from the younger man's lips, but it was such a beautiful sight under him that he nearly lost his rhythm to stare. There was a little hiccup of pause, but he was also driving over and over into that tightened heat of Clive's walls around his cock that he couldn't stop.
And that was the point for him as his hand became covered in some cum was to hold Clive there in that space of pleasure. He angled his hips so he dragged out the aftermath pleasure by driving his cock hard against the younger man's prostate, holding Clive in the depths of pleasure to wring him out, to show the full depth of what sex could allow someone to enjoy and endure in equal measure.
It was such a rush, and he was a few minutes behind Clive but he did orgasm with a loud growling groan, driving himself hard into his lover and riding Clive's hips as he released himself. Yet, as he tended to, he shifted his body and curled over Clive, his arms moving up to circle the younger man's head in a distinctly protective yet subconscious gesture. He kissed the corner of Clive's mouth and remained there as his hips ground against his lover's ass as he released himself in hot spurts, his eyes closing as he slowed and breathed hard through his nose.]
...you okay, beautiful? [His voice was hoarse and spent. He was a sweaty mess, but that was an excellent orgasm and he was all the happier for it.]
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Date: 2025-07-24 02:38 pm (UTC)Clive was too far gone to register Vander’s stare, his hunger as he watched the younger man writhe under him and beg for more, for release, for pleasure. The slightest whine fell from his lips at the hiccup in pace, but it didn’t matter. He was already crashing over the edge of an orgasm so intense his whole body could not stop trembling from it.
And how Vander kept driving into him after he came? Clive couldn’t help how loud he moaned, how much his body squirmed against the other man. Somehow, someway, Clive had just enough presence of mind to fight his body from shying away from the overwhelming pleasure. He wanted it. He wanted Vander pounding against his already overstimulated prostate, to feel the pleasure so extreme it started to become pain.
The expletive that fell from Clive’s mouth slurred into a moan deep enough to make his chest vibrate when he felt that wonderful warm heat start to fill him. He wanted that cum. He wanted all of it so deep he would never forget the feeling of being completely and totally filled by this man, that whenever he touched himself, fingered himself, he would remember what it was like to be dripping with the man over him, that it would never be quite enough without this glorious cock.
Just when Clive thought he might truly fall apart, Vander curled around him. He clung, suddenly desperate to keep himself safe from the world outside of Vander’s arms. It was cold out there, frightening and vast. He knew what happened next. Vander would finish riding out his pleasure, let himself come down, and then he would be alone. He couldn’t be alone. Maybe if he held on hard enough, he could have a few more minutes, long enough to quell the ache, to be ready for what he ran from. And yet, his eyes burned, his chest constricted.]
Please don’t go. [His whisper so quiet it barely left his lips, too afraid that if he spoke loud enough, he would break.]
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Date: 2025-07-24 05:23 pm (UTC)He slowly lowered himself to cover Clive's body completely, even as he began to soften inside and could roll off. He didn't. His arms tightened around both of their heads, caging them in together as he finally eased his legs and allowed them to half hang off of the bed, lightly knocking their feet together as he panted against Clive's cheek as his pulse slowly began to calm.]
Easy, handsome, I'm not going anywhere. [He heard quiet pain in Clive's voice, and it wounded him.
How many quick go arounds like this as Clive experienced? Had they been consensual or forced? Had they been the usual unfeeling quick quickies that was necessary but ended up being wholly unsatisfying for someone who seemed to want an emotional connection?
His fingers carded through Clive's damp hair, his own falling forward to caress his and Clive's face. He lightly peppered kisses across the younger man's cheeks and chin and lips, making no motion to move off of Clive until the younger man nudged or pushed him away. No, he was settled and letting the cooler air dry the sweat of his back and sides.]
You said I could stay over, remember? Why would I leave before we had to puzzle out how to sleep in the same bed when we are far too large for?
[He kissed and lingered on the scar on Clive's cheek.]
What do you need from me, Clive?
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Date: 2025-07-24 07:02 pm (UTC)The bubble of warmth that covered him as Vander made a cage for them both soothed something in him and made another thing turn sour. He shouldn’t need this. He was a grown ass man who had sex with plenty of people before this. This wasn’t different. It was sex with someone he just met, chasing a pleasure.
But it was different. Vander had been attentive, funny, giving. He had taken his time, helped Clive pace himself despite both of them being desperate for their bodies to be connected. He was all-encompassing, then and now.
Ultimately, it was the gentle affection that did him in. He withstood the fingers running through his hair even when his chest tightened, the first kiss, the second kiss, and the third kiss tore through the thin defense he had left. It was a gentle kiss to his upper cheekbone, near his eye, that made him choke. He hoped desperately that his closed eyes would stop the way he could feel his eyes watering.
Fuck. He was not going to cry. It was just sex. He could do this. Clive took slow, deep breaths and loosened his grip, forced his desperation back despite it’s strong and clawing attempt to overwhelm him.
He really needed to stop lying to himself.
’What do you need from me, Clive?’
It hit him like a blow to the solar plexus. Everything. Nothing. Something. That tear he fought so hard to keep in slipped out.]
Fuck. [He hissed, not wanting to pull his arm in to wipe it away.] Sorry. Don’t know what’s come over me. I’m okay.
[Clive had never been any good at lying.]
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Date: 2025-07-24 07:49 pm (UTC)He felt warm and wanted by that hold, the way that Clive didn't push him away and remained safely under his bulk. It wasn't his first time in this situation, but it had been a very long time. Self-sufficiency and unwillingness to show vulnerability was part and parcel of life in the Undercity. Too much weakness and someone could take advantage.
He hummed low in his throat as emotion overwhelmed Clive under him, eyes clenched shut but eyelashes wet and that expression showed it all. He nuzzled his nose against Clive's jawline, felt it tighten subtly after his question and watched that single tear fall from the corner of Clive's eye. His hand snapped down to capture the younger man's hand before it could wipe the tear away, all so he could lean up to kiss it away.
His arms moved as Clive swore, sliding them around the younger man's shoulders and pulling him in as he rolled them over so that Vander could wrap his arms and legs around the younger man to hold him close and allow Clive to use his neck as a way to escape further scrutiny on his part.]
I probably pushed you too hard after your orgasm. You can get wrung out being pushed like that. [He moved his rest his head on the top of Clive's.] Maybe I knocked something fun loose in you. [It was said teasingly, allowing them to rally together and lighten the mood.]
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Date: 2025-07-24 09:01 pm (UTC)Assuming Vander wanted to get to know him better after this. It was embarrassing and Clive just wanted to dig himself a hole. He had never cried after sex before, never even felt his eyes burn. It had all been transactional, almost like services provided, professional. Maybe that was why. This was the furthest from that. This was passion and care and nothing that Clive had ever had but something he was realizing he had always wanted.
Founder save him, what a mess he was. If this was what he was going to be like maybe he should save Vander the trouble. The problem with that was that he didn’t want to. He didn’t want to let go of this. It was shocking and it hurt but it was also warm and fulfilling and it all had felt so good. Would he be asking for too much if he asked for their previous talk of seeing each other again would still stand?
Reflexively, he almost resisted when Vander grabbed his hand before he could reach his face, but then the older man was kissing the tear away and oh if that didn’t make something in him want to cry more. Was it relief? Gratitude? It wasn’t sorrow. Longing maybe? No matter what it was, Clive couldn’t help the little sigh that escaped him.
When offered, Clive took the opportunity to bury himself in Vander, pressing himself as close as he possibly could and tangling Vander’s legs with his own. He gladly tucked his face against Vander’s neck and breathed him in, his scent mixing with the smell of his sweat and their sex. His body already starting to calm down, Clive nuzzled in and pressed a soft kiss to Vander’s neck, a silent thanks.
Maybe. Though I did ask you to. [Another kiss, a little more playful this time, trying to show Vander that he was okay.] And it did feel ridiculously good.
[Clive playfully nipped Vander’s neck and smiled against him.]
Seems like you are particularly skilled in that department. If I’m not careful, I won’t have anything on the shelves anymore. You’ll turn me into a mess.
[A pause. His tone has a teasing edge to it when he speaks.]
Well, even more of a mess.
[He kisses Vander’s neck again, slowly, before nuzzling back in. This was the hard part. Teasing he could handle, but he didn’t want that to be the only thing they had after this outside of his practically vibrating apart.]
Thank you. I’m sorry if I made things uncomfortable.
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Date: 2025-07-25 12:08 am (UTC)His arms remained supportive and warm around Clive's big broad shoulders, and his hands slowly stroked comforting lines up and down the lower portions of the younger man's back that he could reach. With their legs tangled, he stroked the upper portions of his feet against Clive's soles and toes. The obvious wetness between them from their activities would have to be cleaned, but he wasn't yet willing to part from their closeness right now, least of all with Clive kissing him.
Was it a distraction or a sign of affection or both? Likely both, soothing the potential awkwardness generated though he certainly didn't experience anything like that.]
Well, the point was to make us both feel good, and it seems that we accomplished that. You seem experienced, but have you been with partners who don't have much or aren't particularly mutual?
[He huffed a sound of amusement because yes he was skilled. Vander had been bedding down with people and being intimate with them since he was fifteen, and he had once had quite the appetite for such interactions. It had settled as he grew older and more experienced and his attention turned more to the liberation of Zaun then the Lanes and then... it had evaporated for the most part after the Day of Ash. Only since arriving in Etraya had he re-discovered the pleasure of having such intimacy often and building a connection well afterwards.
He kissed Clive's forehead affectionately.] You're handsome in all states of put-together and a mess, Clive. And I appreciate you showing me this vulnerability, intended or not.
[He chuffed softly, amused that discomfort was the potential take away.]
I'm not uncomfortable, so you have no reason to apologize. My take away is that I am so good at sex, I make grown men shed tears of joy. It was a very manly tear, if you want to think about it like that, though... I still contend you're the most beautiful man I've ever seen.
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Date: 2025-07-25 12:10 pm (UTC)And, well, he was comfortable. Mess aside, it felt nice being held like this. Clive hadn’t known anyone who could wrap around him like this. The gentle touch was soothing, as it was likely intended, but even had he not being in a heightened emotional state, he would have wanted this. Clive couldn’t help the little nuzzles he kept rubbing against Vander’s neck, the light tracing patterns he made across Vander’s back with mindlessly affectionate fingertips.
He made a thoughtful sound against Vander’s skin.]
It was always mutual, just not particularly thorough.
[There hadn’t been a desire for that to be so, at least not on Clive’s part. And there was never time or the safety for it, a natural consequence for it being illegal for Clive to be touched.]
Well, I did ask you to take me apart so. Mission accomplished.
[Clive hunkered in, feeling himself blush yet again at the word. He nodded in response to the thanks, not really trusting himself to not sound like a complete idiot if he spoke. Objectively, he knew he was handsome. He had been told so a thousand times out of a hundred mouths, but this was different. Why did it feel so different? And any chuckle he felt building at Vander’s joke turned into the gentlest gasp. If handsome pulled at him, beautiful? Beautiful was an altogether different beast. Clive wanted to kiss him again. Badly.
So he did.
Clive pulled back just enough to tilt his head up and press his lips gently to Vander’s before whispering against them.]
And here you are again, flattering me. I’m beginning to think you are doing this on purpose.
[A joke, but also a question in a way. Coming from Vander, he wanted these words to be true.]
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Date: 2025-07-25 01:11 pm (UTC)Vander was actually curious what that would appear as when he considered how lusty they had been with each other to reach this point. He was reluctant to lose the emotion and physical closeness with Clive, so he kept his arms and legs secured as they were until the younger man had had enough of his cuddling or the urge to further take care of Clive by cleaning them both up overrode the warm feeling.
After all, they could still cuddle after a good cleaning.
A low rumble left his throat at the nuzzling, his grey eyes closing as he savoured the sensation of simple and pure physical affection like that. No ulterior motive, no need to lead them down the path of sex again, just two men being affection with each other after an amazing orgasm.]
Ah, you mean it was for the purpose of releasing pressure or just a quick run in for the kicks?
[He was pleased to think that he could be considered thorough in this case. It still amazed him they had managed to make it back here in the first place. That in and of itself was a true accomplishment and then perhaps the arduous requirements of removing Clive's outfit had forced them to pace themselves. A little. Probably unintentionally.]
And now I'll put you back together.
[Hence the honest flattery. He could feel a little wave of heat against his neck signaling that Clive was either breathing harder or flushed. He tipped his head when he felt Clive move, expecting some words or them to look in each others eyes.
Instead, he found his lips captured, and he moaned softly at the pleasure in that. It said more than words ever could. He lifted one arm off of Clive's shoulders so he could cup the side of the younger man's cheek as they kissed.]
I am. [He whispered back.] It's truth, and it's clear you need to hear it and haven't been provided that enough in your life.
[Unlike Clive, he was earnest and serious.]
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Date: 2025-07-25 05:10 pm (UTC)A dreamy sigh responded to the low rumble from Vander. Those sounds alone could undo him, melt him into nothing, even when they weren’t doing anything sexual. It was the warmth in him of knowing that he wasn’t the only one impacted by the other. At least he hoped that was the case. Sounds could be faked. He was going to choose that these were real.]
Releasing pressure, mostly. Usually tension built up after battle.
[Might as well give a bit more context. He had already exposed this much of himself, whether he intended to or not. Surprisingly, he didn’t feel particularly hesitant about sharing that as he would with other people he knew. Maybe it was the fact that this was new, that Vander didn’t know anything about him that made him more comfortable.
Another beautiful sound that Clive captured between his lips. He could listen to those sounds until the heavens fell and the world ended and not get sick of them. The gentle way Vander held his cheek helped those feelings bloom. Clive tried and failws to fight back the little whimper that escaped lightly parted lips.]
Vander, I - You - Wh- [Clive cut himself off. No, what was going on in his mind was a maelstrom that he couldn’t put into words. Through it all, one thought hit him.
’I could fall for this man.’
That was what did it really, to help motivate him to finally pull away to tidy up. That wasn’t what this was. Things like this, they weren’t made for that kind of affection, not for anyone Clive had ever known, no matter what he ended up wanting. Besides, they had met in person once, talked twice. What, because he used a couple of pretty words in a voice so soft it made his heart clench, that was enough to make him swoon? Fire and Flame, how lonely was he?
And yet, he was still reluctant to detangle himself. But he did. They did need to be clean.]
Let me show you the bathhouse. We could both use it. Besides,
[And he really couldn’t help himself. Lust was safer but no less true. He leaned down from his position on the side of the bed to whisper in his ear.]
I want to know what it feels like to have your cum drip out of me when I walk.
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Date: 2025-07-25 06:07 pm (UTC)He nodded his head in understanding. The additional information it into context and he walked his fingers down Clive's dorsal spine processes.]
I understand what that's like. The bloodlust rush and no where for the energy to go so it becomes sexual energy. [When he had fought in the pits, it had been the same. That left over energy that drinking and dancing wouldn't quench.
Sometimes it was a quick person who showed interest, but more often, it was people who knew him or one in particular who was so often subjected to his intensity and interest. Those days seemed tinged with sadness and frustration these days, but back then, he had been having the time of his life regardless of how many times he had been punched or kicked that night. Vander rarely lost.
He felt revitalized as they kissed and cuddled like this, not exactly a rarity for him these days, but he enjoyed each and every opportunity. It chased away all the memories and decisions that lingered just behind his eyes. Yet, any thought of those old painful memories evaporated as Clive stuttered and fell over words, and it was actual restraint not to lean in and kiss him hard.
Perhaps it was best that Clive began to shift and move, making it clear that their cuddle time was over, and he wrinkled his nose as their bodies came apart and the mess they had made was smeared between them. He released his arms and levered himself up on an elbow to sit on the edge of the bed next to Clive, shivering at those whispered words.
What a filthy man. He enjoyed it.]
I'll be sure to walk behind you to enjoy the mess I made of you. [He smirked and nudged Clive with his shoulder.]
A good bath will do us both well, I think. Besides, a bath does mean I can still have my hands on you.
[He pushed himself to his feet, stepping over discarded clothing. If he stayed on the bed, there was no telling that they would behave themselves after all.]
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Date: 2025-07-25 07:20 pm (UTC)Vander’s understanding of the feeling was startling, but the kinship he felt there sparked. There had been no real way he could describe the feeling that came with violence unshed and with Vander, he didn’t have to.]
Exactly. Having sex was safer than fighting. Less noticeable.
[And moderately more satisfying. When he was like that, when he needed that release, if his opponent couldn’t stand their own against him, it didn’t help. He needed to be challenged and there were so few who could do that, even then. Once Tiamat had found him it had been different, but not by much.
There was that shade of sorrow underneath it all and he knew that his eyes reflected the same. Embarrassment had temporarily robbed Clive of his and it seems Vander’s too. Well, if he was going to look like a fool at least something positive could come from it.
It did, however, take a great deal of willpower and hands gripped hard enough in the sheets for his knuckles to turn white to not grab Vander and drag him back down after he stood. How he could even feel a spark of arousal after all they had done, he had no idea.
Gravity was already starting to do its work as Clive stood. This wasn’t the first time he had let someone come inside him, but it certainly was the most enjoyable. The feeling of the slow trickle of cum tickling its way onto his thigh was strange to say the least, but imagining the look in Vander’s eyes as he watched Clive walk ahead of him made his heart rate increase.
Clive slid by Vander to get to the door, dragging a hand along the small of his back and then giving his ass a playful slap before stepping out. The bath was right next door with the sauna and he wasn’t particularly worried about anyone seeing him right now. He didn’t know where Yuri and An Zhe were, but he knew that everyone else was at the battle.]
It’s funny, [He threw an inviting look back at Vander.] I was going to say the same thing. I hope you don’t think you will be doing the majority of the touching.
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Date: 2025-07-25 08:11 pm (UTC)[It wasn't battle. It wasn't war. Not in the same sense that he expected that Clive fought and suffered under. He had chosen that path because he was talented, people loved to see him fight and of course win a lot of money on him usually. It made ends meet when the mines or the docks didn't provide enough, and Vander also knew that life wasn't sustainable. He'd taken his share of hits to the head to know it would kill him if it was his primary income, so he didn't. He had that choice. Clive clearly had not.]
Less noticeable, is it? [Vander made a point of running his hand over where he knew Clive had marked him and then over the reddened hand print on his pectoral that had been burned there. He smirked, nudging the younger man when Clive flowed to his feet similarly.
He let Clive take the lead so he could indeed watch the younger man's back, and his eyes fell to the cum leaking down the back of Clive's thighs and even between them. He chewed his lower lip to keep from making noise about the sight as his stomach felt like it was flipping from heat and pleasure. His shoulders twitched and his hands had to clench to resist reaching out to capture Clive around the waist when the younger man slapped his ass. He was not twenty years old anymore. He could behave.
So he followed a few steps behind, watching the way Clive walked and his brows drew together. How did this man not have lovers parading in and out of his bed at all times? So much sex appeal.
Vander followed, unashamed of his body or his nudity as they moved from one room down the hall the bathing area. It was hot and humid in here as he stepped in, looking around at the amenities, and he smirked at the teasing words. He walked forward as if he were going to explore where everything lead and instead took the opportunity to slap Clive's ass as a returned favour.]
It sounds like we're competing again. It also sounds like we mutually benefit, so I don't mind.
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Date: 2025-07-25 08:50 pm (UTC)Not finding a way to expell the rest of that energy could be dangerous. Better to not tempt fate.
[That brought a chuckle out of Clive, feeling a little lighter. He returned the smirk and fought the temptation to touch one of the marks. Two for two on the success rate of resisting touching Vander. He wasn’t sure that would last terribly long.]
You, sir, are a special circumstance.
[Clive could practically feel Vander’s eyes on him. How his body found it in itself to send a thrill through him, he had no idea. He let himself bask in the feeling, even if it came with the silent plea to Vander to grab him, touch him again, kiss him. He was capable of controlling himself. He was a grown man.
Until Vander returned the slap when they were safely inside the bathing room. Then he whipped around with the speed and grace of someone who had honed their body for physicality and the sword for decades, grabbing Vander’s wrist and yanking him back. He met Vander half way, putting a hand on his hip to stabilize him while pressing hungry lips against the older man’s.
He guided Vander back towards the bath, stopping at the edge and giving Vander’s hip a squeeze. With a gentle push of his hip and light tug of his wrist, Clive lowered the two of them to the edge of the warm water before breaking the kiss.]
I see you’re used to winning. [Clive reached for a small bucket and ran it through the water. He dipped a finger in for a moment until the water was steaming afresh and poured it slowly over Vander’s chest, rubbing small circles against where he could see they had pressed their mess together.]
I’m not going to let this one go quite as easily.
no subject
Date: 2025-07-25 09:12 pm (UTC)Were all the people at the front with you branded like you? At least people with their backs against the wall similarly that you could bond with?
[He liked the idea of being a special circumstance with Clive. They had certainly found their youth with each other, impulsiveness and idiocy in equal measure because they somehow lacked much self control thus far. How long would this last? It could be this encounter, or he suspected it may take time to run its course from their systems. After all, he wanted to know about that hunger he had seen reflected, know its source, perhaps feel it again before they had parted ways in the morning.
Perhaps feel it against his skin more than once.
It seemed likely the way that they teased each other, and he was not disappointed when Clive turned on him. He set his shoulders and dropped his stance on his knees as if expecting the younger man to pounce on him or maybe even decide to shove him. His hands were already poised to respond, years of experience raising his defenses naturally and subconsciously. He noted instantly that their stances were different, and he could pick out why that was. Vander was a brawler. Clive was someone who used the blade. It required different stances and movements to accomplish proficiently.
And that's where he had the advantage as Clive pulled him in. He crowded in quickly, closing their distance with the pull and nearly slamming his chest around Clive's. Clive was not a small man by any measure, but Vander was built and honed for close-quarter encounters, and he knew how to take up space with his body even as their lips crashed together.
It wasn't a fight, but he felt the flicker of interest of a throw down as his parted his lips to allow the younger man access and control of that as his hands settled neatly on Clive's hips. He allowed himself to be guided in the unfamiliar room, and he managed to step down into the bath without tripping.
As soon as Clive pulled from the kiss, Vander was leaning in to mouth against the younger man's jawline, up to his ear where he growled a low affectionate challenge. His hands dropped away as he was no where physically ready for another round of fun so soon, and they had to be clean before they could enjoy being dirty again.]
I wouldn't say that. I've suffered my fair share of losses, but there's always something to learn in them. [He looked down, noting the finger in the water and shifting curiosity.] Is that magic? No... runes or words or gestures? It just comes to you?
[Curiosity made him compliant to the washing, shivering at the warmth of the water and enjoying it. He had only just cooled from their previous fornication.]
Aren't you? I'll let you have this round.
no subject
Date: 2025-07-25 10:05 pm (UTC)Some of them were. A lot of us were essentially used as human shields for foot soldiers. Very few were trained well. Some of us came to the front battle-ready, some not quite so much. It was safer not to get attached. Nine times out of ten, you wouldn't see them again.
[And Clive had been a whirlwind. The only place he felt even a modicum of life was in the fray, sword and fire both a massacre and a dance. That skill saved him from the front, but did not put him anywhere even remotely safer. But those were stories he kept locked deep. His latest attempt to talk about it hadn’t exactly been fulfilling or relieving.
As was what seemed to be his habit, Vander chased the ruminations away. His mind registered the shift in position, saw the preparation for defense and retaliation, and he had to stop himself from reflexively responding in kind. He groaned at the feeling of Vander pressed against him again.
He let his head fall to the side once they were seated, giving Vander access as he warmed the water. When Vander dropped away, Clive turned to nip his ear, responding with his own growl, almost low enough to be a purr. He could wait. Hell, he needed to wait. His body wouldn’t be ready for another round. That didn’t mean he couldn’t enjoy the feeling.
The light that came to Vander’s eyes when he was curious was so beautiful. The fire of passion kindled into something gentler, a softer affection. He wanted to touch him, cup his cheek, tell him he was beautiful. But first, he needed to help the man satiate his curiosity.]
Mmhmm. [Clive pulled his hand back from Vander’s torso, having removed the bulk of the mess, and let a lick of flame start at his fingertip and wrap slowly down his hand before shaping it into an orb and letting it float into the air, illuminating the area in a flickering glow.]
We’re born with it. Some gestures can help concentrate it or guide it, but they aren’t needed. Though most don’t use it as flippantly as this. Turning to stone can be one hell of a deterrent when a person has the choice.
[Clive took a slow breath, turning to fiddle with the bucket. He should look when he said this, made eye contact, but he couldn’t.]
But like I told you before, I can use as much magic as I want and I do without a single speck of stone appearing on my skin. Fire isn’t the only element that responds to me either. In a strange sort of way, I’m a collector. Not exactly because I want to be.
[First, a green sheen pulls through the air, blowing the orb above them farther away, the air giving it a small burst of fuel. Then, a bit of lightning dances up Clive’s arm and disappears when it touches his cheek, chased by scales of earth rippling across the same arm as though it were making armor and dissipating. Finally, small motes of light rise off of him, filling the air with a constellation of sparkling pinpricks, before those slowly fade and then the fire goes out.
Clive didn’t move or say a single thing through the entire display, bucket forgotten in his hands as he stared at the water licking at his feet.]
no subject
Date: 2025-07-25 10:28 pm (UTC)You've weathered a lot of trauma in your lifetime. You shoulder it well. Do you... find the nights hard? When you're alone with no one to distract you from the remembrance?
[He asked it quietly and with understanding, yet he kept any expectation of a long answer out of his voice entirely. He would not wish to be pressured to provide any such details with someone he had just met, and yet, there was that feeling of kinship. It was so rare that he found that connection so quickly. Still, it was dangerous territory to ask such things as reciprocation was how many might respond. Was he ready to grind their good mood into the ground? No, perhaps neither them were. This was best for a pillow talk when the room was completely dark.
He seated himself next to Clive, shivering at the little growl-like-purr from the younger man. He liked that sound, and it brought his nose back around to nudge and nuzzle Clive's cheek in response. Neither was them were in position to start something, of course. This was still strangely comfortable, the play, the affection.
He did not hide his curiosity or his awe over this strange power. He had seen illusion magic tricks as a boy and even learned a few to amuse his children before they were too old to appreciate it. What Clive was capable of was like the stories of old, the mages who could wield the elements at their whim and create mass destruction if they wanted to. Then he was reminded of the spirits like Janna whose control over wind and air made her a saviour to sailor and those lost in the tunnels of the undercity.
His eyes widened as Clive moved from one element to another to another, and from his conversation with Cid, that did not seem particularly usual. Even Clive's own words indicated that it was not typical, though he could not and did not understand the implications of what it would mean to be a 'collector' of anything magic related. It was dawning on him how unique Clive was, especially when he recalled the way Cid's skin had looked, mottled and hardened.
He shifted so he could rest his shoulder against Clive's, still looking at the spot in the air where the fire had last been seen. He was keenly aware of the younger man's pensive quietness, and he slid his arm around that slim waist.]
I've never seen anything like that before. It's amazing what you can do. [He pulled his eyes and regarded Clive then moved to rest his forehead to the younger man's temple.] You keep showing me these tricks of yours and I might swoon, handsome. You're talented, but in the end, I like you for you rather than what you can do.
no subject
Date: 2025-07-25 11:09 pm (UTC)My life has been a long one for as short as it has been.
[Clive stopped to make eye contact, to really look at Vander. He searched those grey eyes that showed and hid so much. That was not a question from a man who was not intimately familiar with pain. He cupped Vander’s face gently between his hands. He gently stroked Vander’s cheekbones, considering what he wanted to share.]
They can be. But I expect you are familiar with that.
[He guided Vander’s face down and pressed a kiss to the other man’s forehead before shifting to press his forehead to Vander’s, nuzzling their noses lightly together.]
You can come to me when the nights are difficult to weather.
[They didn’t need to talk about how those nights were difficult or what that may look like, not now. He expected that getting Vander to actually accept the help and follow through with it would be particularly difficult, but he didn’t have much ground to stand on there either. Regardless, there would be time for that. And time was likely what was needed.
Had Clive been watching Vander as he showed his magic, maybe he would not have been as surprised when the other man moved closer and slid his arm around his waist. He heard the man moving so he did not freeze or flinch at the contact. If anything, he leaned into it. He expected hesitancy, maybe even fear, but not this. It was comfortable and warm. It was something he wanted to keep.
He had been planning on telling Vander that he was the one that he told him about earlier, that he was the vessel for a creature that labelled itself god, but maybe he didn’t have to. Not because it was a secret to be hidden, but because Vander may genuinely not change his mind.]
You like me for me.
[Clive swung himself into Vander’s lap and kissed him, slow and soft, another thank you done in words he didn’t know how to use. He pulled back but stayed in Vander’s lap. He wanted to see his face, to look into his eyes, to see the warmth that he heard in the other man’s voice, even at what he thought to be the light tease.]
You call me beautiful, and yet, here you are.
[He stroked the back of a hand along Vander’s cheek before turning it to rest against the side of Vander’s neck.]
Do you realize what you do? I mean truly understand it? A soul like yours is rare and usually forged from pain. I see it in you. [He raised his hand again to touch at the corner of Vander’s eye.] But I also see the beauty you hold. Our souls may carry something dark in them, but they also carry something profoundly good.
[Clive leaned in and kissed him before resting their foreheads together.]
Did you know that when you find something curious or interesting you get this little light in your eye, like the world is a marvelous place and you want that little bit of it not just to yourself but to share. It’s - [Clive laughed quietly.]
You talk about my making you swoon, but if you keep showing me sights like that I might just be doomed.
[He pulled Vander to him in a hug and rested his chin on the other man’s shoulder. He’s a little shyer when next he speaks.]
And I like it when you call me handsome. Never thought I’d be the type to like pet names.
no subject
Date: 2025-07-26 05:09 pm (UTC)He maintained eye contact right back, and he was once again reminded how bright blue Clive's irises were. More than that, the younger man displayed a similar pain that he knew lived inside of him, and he wondered what mistakes or regrets that lay burdened on Clive. Or perhaps it was all loss. He knew about Cid after all. That couldn't be easy.]
It seems like we both are familiar. [There was no need to delve into details.] I appreciate the offer. Thankfully I'm a bartender, so most nights are filled with serving equal parts happiness and misery to people. [But those early morning hours? From three-to-five? Those were tough and he hoped he was sleeping through it.
Perhaps someday he would take Clive up on the offer. Usually, he exhausted himself so it wasn't as necessary these days as it had been when he first arrived to Etraya and had nothing but pain and memories. The nights were easier, but the bad ones came on occasion. Sleeping next to someone helped, calmed that notion that he was alone and isolated with only his losses and the realities of his decisions to keep him company.
And it was miracles like this that was an excellent distraction. Clive wasn't the only one with magic, of course. He'd seen signs of it from others on various missions, had been informed of his inferiority by teens with wacky powers, and he'd watched it all with curiosity. This was probably the first time someone showed him without superiority but with a tinge of pensive sadness, like Clive was waiting for rejection. It was valid, wasn't it? It's how Clive had been treated and how the younger man had ended up branded.
He smiled as Clive swung up into his lap again and he parted his legs to provide a larger area for the younger man to perch. His arm moved from around Clive's waist to settle instead on the younger man's hip, and he tipped his head back just a little to continue to view Clive.]
I do, yeah. Though you seem to be waiting for a different reaction about being elemental collector. You're special as who you are, and I like that.
[The kiss spoke more of the younger man's emotional state than word probably could, and he could read into the gesture all he liked. He reached up so he could tuck some of Clive's dark hair back with two fingers, corner of his lips twitching as he felt the Clive's hand on his cheek and all those rough callouses that added character to the touch.
He issued a soft 'ha' at the question, his expression soft and relatively open.] We've both lived difficult eclectic lives. I wouldn't consider my soul any rarer than anyone else. You and I just happen to share certain similarities. [Yet, his grey eyes darkened for a moment, and he glanced aside for a moment as he recalled that memory of what he would become. He looked back at Clive.] There is something dark in me.
[He let that kiss soothe the momentary disquiet and he nudged their noses together as Clive's forehead came to rest on his own. This was a very personal change of pace for them after the flurry from behind, and yet, it felt just as natural.]
You wouldn't be the first to tell me that, but it has been a long time. [He met Clive's gaze with his own.] The world is a marvelous place. And it's made better because you're in it just being yourself.
[He chuckled and wrapped his arms around Clive's waist, appreciating the sentiment. He hadn't been looking for feelings to develop aside from camaraderie and friendship, yet their connection was oddly deep for having just met.]
I want... you to feel good about this, about everything. There's a sadness to you that I see and we've only just met, but I like you, Clive.
[He stroked his hands up and down Clive's back, turning his head just a bit to view the younger man from the corner of his eye.]
Is that so? Do you prefer handsome or beautiful? I'm good with both.
no subject
Date: 2025-07-26 10:52 pm (UTC)[A light blush spreads from the tips of his ears to dust on his cheeks as he talks. There was only one person he had ever spoken to about this, but Vander felt like a safe option. It felt like Clive could show parts of him that he had been too nervous to with others that knew him from home. There were no ideas of who he was, of what might be at odds with what they saw from him regularly.]
Then maybe on the nights that are too much to bear I can come visit. Is there something that can play music where you work?
[He couldn’t guarantee that he would go or not. Sometimes solitude was what was best when the nights were difficult. He thought of all of the nights he spent in the Fat Chocobo or the Tub and Crown, nursing an ale and listening to music in the quiet of the night. There was always someone awake at the Hideaway, but it was as if there was some unspoken rule that the wee hours of the morning or the darkest hours of night were not for talking. He still ended up being the receiver of many a woe, but he didn’t mind. Helping people distracted him and it only improved the lives of others.]
I’ve found that music soothes in a way that most things don’t.
[Clive settled in at Vander’s unspoken offer of more space. They would get back to washing, but right now the only thing he felt particularly inclined to focus on was the man in front of him. The bath wasn’t going anywhere. It could wait. For now, he was going to marvel at the man beneath him, watch the shifts in those beautiful grey eyes, the slight changes in his face as he went from talking about pain and happiness, the wall of flippancy he pulled up at compliments, how genuine he was in his praise. He was a strange man and Clive did not want to miss a single thing.
Clive smiles and in it there is both sorrow and relief.]
Thank you. [Perhaps it was an odd thing to say to someone telling you that you are special as you are, but he didn’t know how else to convey to Vander how much those words truly meant. Clive closed his eyes, sighing into the touch. When was the last time someone had touched his hair? Had there been a time?]
You can disagree with me on that, but - [He placed a quick, light kiss to the tip of Vander’s nose.] You would be wrong. [Clive, too, moved to tuck some hair behind Vander’s ear and searched his eyes.] You’re not alone in that. [Clive gives Vander a small, sad smile.] At least we are in that particular boat together.
[And that is all Clive is going to say on that matter. He lets their proximity soothe him just as much as it soothes Vander. This was not what he had expected when he brought Vander home, but it was wonderful. A bit frightening for how deep the connection felt after so little time together, but still oddly right. That was something to examine later. For now, Clive melted into the feeling of Vander’s arms around him.]
Likewise. I didn’t expect to meet someone quite like you here and, well, I like you too. There is so much I want to know, to show you. Is that strange?
[There was so much that Clive wanted to learn about Vander. He wanted to see the world through his eyes, the beautiful, the strange, the ugly. To hear about his life, his stories, his joys and sorrows. Clive had always enjoyed getting to know people, but what startled him here was that he wanted to return that sentiment. He wanted to show Vander the quiet beauty of the world around them, the soothing wash of the moon at night, how water lapping against the shore brought solace, the music the world made. To share with him peace, but also pain. Joy and rage. Hope and fear.
Clive tilted his head and pressed a kiss to Vander’s neck, humming in pleasure at the feeling of Vander’s hands running up and down his back. How a man could both set him ablaze and soothe him so thoroughly, Clive didn’t think he would ever know.]
Hmm… [Clive thought for a bit, the room quiet save for the gentle sound of water lapping against the sides of the bath.]
Can I be selfish and ask for both?
[He was well and truly blushing now. From many others it may sound like a bit of a joke, asking if they could be selfish, but there was something painfully genuine about his whispered question.]
no subject
Date: 2025-07-27 05:08 pm (UTC)[Perhaps it was that he would also try to help Clive succeed in saving his world, not that Vander thought that he could do all that much. Perhaps they would be partnered on a mission in future, but he did wish that sort of opportunity for someone that wanted it. He had the impression that the road ahead of Clive was long and difficult. He did want to support any way that he could; this was a young man who deserved to find a path to eventual happiness and peace.
He hummed at the question, fingers still carding lightly through Clive's sweeping bangs to put them in some semblance of order. Mostly he was doing it to keep touching the younger man.]
Yeah, there's a jukebox in the place that plays some good music. What kind of music do you like? I always turn it on when I'm doing prep when I open and clean up when I close. I'll save you a seat at the bar if you want to come and visit. I'll even pour you your favourite drink, whatever that may be.
[The offer was there between them then. If they needed a little company, they could find each other in their various spaces and just exist together. It was an option, meaning that there was no pressure to endure alone if that was preferable. Yet, he did wonder if he would make the trek out to the Monastery on occasion to see Clive, though the younger man seemed to be active and would make busy in the time between missions. They could find each other randomly. People like them tended to be able to do that.
And there was plenty that they would learn about each other. Vander was currently aware of their similarities and their differences. Clive reminded him a little of himself when he was decades younger, full of life and stubborn. There was pain tinged there too, overlaid and buried with determination and earnest charisma.]
What does being a elemental collector mean to you? To everyone else who knows you?
[He thought it might be worthwhile to learn a little about this. Even if he didn't consider it important to his affections to Clive, that didn't mean he shouldn't learn more about it. After all, there were plenty from Clive's world here, and if Vander was associating, it might be important for him to understand nuance so he could both protect and help the younger man where others maybe involved.
He huffed softly, aware that Clive had a different opinion on his soul. He also had the impression that there was no turning it right now. His hands stroked the younger man's thighs and hips then up until he was stroking his fingers over muscle layered over Clive's ribs.]
Are you saying that I don't know myself better than you do? You're turning in a bit of a punk if you're going to claim that. [His tone was jovial and amused and without any heat. If anything, there was a rebound of affection in it. Then his tone went softer, serious.] That's what I saw in your eyes on the hilltop, isn't it? That darkness you have to control or else...?
[They could end it there, not speak on such things and just return to enjoying one another's company. The bath and its water was all here, and Clive was smearing cum on his thighs from being seated that long. He moved to gather water to start to wash the younger man's belly of their shared mess from not even an hour before, rubbing his hands and removing the residue even as he watched the younger man perched on his lap.]
The timing is probably strange, but I'm willing to go with it if you are. Isn't that how all friendships start?
[They have clearly sped up that timeline in their own way with how intensely they react to each other, but he found it comforting to connect this strongly to another person. They came from completely different worlds that carried similarities in theme and the human condition, but they had so much that they could show and tell, to drag details out in casual conversation and well... he had no doubt this wasn't the end of their intimacy together.
He tipped his chin up and away at the lips on his neck, rumbling in his chest softly. His hands continued their motions while also occasionally washing their fronts with damp hands.]
It's not selfish at all, so yes, you can have both.
[He could feel the heat radiating from Clive's face, a smile on his lips knowing that the younger man was blushing up a storm. He liked having nicknames that stuck with his friends and his lovers, though their names were equally important.]
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From:Sorry for the novel
From:I read your novel & provided one in return
From:Legitimately I wonder what the word count is for this whole thread.
From:An actual half novel I expect
From:If it wouldn't be so much dang work I'd check it.
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From:I got about 1/5th of the way through the thread and we were already at 12,000 words.
From:Yeah, yeah it's actually a novel that we've written in here!
From:This is the longest thread I have ever done.
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